Monday, September 5, 2011

Campaign Challenge #1



The door swung open then slammed shut again with a loud bang. Violet looked up from her book. She didn’t want to stop reading but she decided she better go check on Ginny and the baby. This storm had been such a bother. When she stood up she felt the air sucked out her lungs. Maybe I have just been sitting too long she thought. As she walked closer to the door her eyes began to hurt and she felt wobbly.I wish I had someone to check on me was her next thought. Slowly she made her way across the long room. She was cold and her thoughts were jumbled. She couldn’t remember why she had stopped reading. Violet had long arms and as she reached out for the door knob it seemed to her that her arm was getting longer, her fingers began to feel thin and she could see them glowing in the bit of light that came from the window. Violet thought she should be feeling something—fear or pain but she nearly giggled when she realized she didn’t. She laughed to herself realizing a new door had finally opened, a door to the other side.

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35 comments:

  1. 1000th.monkeySeptember 5, 2011 at 10:38 AM

    Ohhh! VERY nice! I really liked this one... how her mental state so quickly deteriorates.

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  2. Nadja NotarianiSeptember 5, 2011 at 10:44 AM

    Great description of Violet's confusion. ~ Nadja

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  3. Alleged AuthorSeptember 5, 2011 at 11:26 AM

    Whoa. Kind of reminded me of "The Yellow Wallpaper." Great job!

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  4. UnknownSeptember 5, 2011 at 1:00 PM

    Thank you each and all...wow, this is fun. Really amazing to read so many takes on that prompt. I need to take the risk to comment on some of the other challenge posts. Feeling a bit shy but I'll jump in...I sure know it feels great to read your words! :
    Thanks again....

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  5. Avery MarshSeptember 5, 2011 at 2:27 PM

    Oh, very cool premise. I love the last line. :)

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  6. Tara TylerSeptember 5, 2011 at 2:49 PM

    startling turn of events. i like to be surprised! well done!

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  7. ruth.the.writerSeptember 5, 2011 at 2:56 PM

    I enjoyed that story!

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  8. Gwen GardnerSeptember 5, 2011 at 5:12 PM

    Drugged maybe? Or too close to another dimension? Nice scene! I'm a new follower from the campaign:)

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  9. AnonymousSeptember 5, 2011 at 7:05 PM

    A very interesting take on this. I'm loving all of the different stories. I'm #72

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  10. UnknownSeptember 5, 2011 at 8:52 PM

    Whew, so great to hear from you all! Happy! :)

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  11. Stacy S. JensenSeptember 5, 2011 at 9:01 PM

    Jodi, I'm stopping by to let you know your story was one of my top 5 in this challenge. So, your story will advance to stage 2 in this challenge. Good luck. - Stacy

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  12. UnknownSeptember 5, 2011 at 9:07 PM

    Wow, thank you Stacy! I am a bit dazed. Really, really happy!

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  13. Stacy S. JensenSeptember 5, 2011 at 9:17 PM

    Still a few stages or rounds to go, but the first step (or word) is always fun and exciting. Have a wonderful writing week.

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  14. UnknownSeptember 5, 2011 at 9:21 PM

    Yes, indeed! A wonderful {writing} week to you, too!

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  15. Gary GauthierSeptember 6, 2011 at 12:11 AM

    It's a very intriguing and mysterious piece that starts out with a very believable setting. Is it science fiction or fantasy? It remains a mystery!

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  16. UnknownSeptember 6, 2011 at 9:42 AM

    Yes, it is a mystery isn't it :)...thanks for commenting!

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  17. David P. KingSeptember 6, 2011 at 1:34 PM

    A door to the other side? Nice one! I enjoyed the detail of your entry a lot, Jodi! :)

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  18. Christine RainsSeptember 6, 2011 at 6:27 PM

    Oh, nicely done! Descriptive and intriguing.

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  19. UnknownSeptember 6, 2011 at 7:23 PM

    Thanks David, I am happy you commented on details...that is something I was hoping for.
    Yeah for your feedback Christine...descriptive! yipppeee...intriguing woot :)

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  20. erica and christySeptember 6, 2011 at 7:24 PM

    Interesting! Definitely leaves us hanging! Nice work! Christy

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  21. CherylSeptember 6, 2011 at 7:25 PM

    Good job! Well done on getting through to the next round :)

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  22. Jessica TherrienSeptember 6, 2011 at 8:01 PM

    I loved how this story progressed. It was great! Congrats on making it to round 2 :)

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  23. UnknownSeptember 6, 2011 at 8:29 PM

    Thanks! I am happily surprised by this whole wonderful process. All of your comments are so helpful and affirming! Isn't this campaign great?!?!

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  24. Doreen McGettiganSeptember 6, 2011 at 11:48 PM

    Very nicely done. I liked it!!

    http://www.doreenmcgettigan.com

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  25. Coleen PatrickSeptember 7, 2011 at 6:36 AM

    So intriguing! Enjoyed this Jodi :)Nicely done!

    http://www.coleenpatrick.com

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  26. UnknownSeptember 7, 2011 at 11:46 AM

    Yipppeee! Will blog hop to your 'pads' soon :)!

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  27. AnonymousSeptember 8, 2011 at 8:01 AM

    Great change from normal to surreal--creepy factor!

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  28. UnknownSeptember 8, 2011 at 10:08 PM

    I particularly love the ending of this piece.Thanks for commenting on mine, the #279.

    Thanks also for joining the The Rule of Three Blogfest , would really appreciate it if you blog about the event, and also spread the word on twitter at the hashtag #REN3.

    Looking forward to your story set in the town of Renaissance!

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  29. Amanda MilnerSeptember 9, 2011 at 12:05 AM

    Ooh! I got goosebumps at the end! And I'm truly hoping it's your skills as a writer and attention to detail that made me so quickly relate to what the character was feeling and not that I have ever experienced something similar. 0.o Lol!Maybe I'm already on the other side. ;)

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  30. UnknownSeptember 9, 2011 at 7:34 AM

    This was so much more developed than most flash fiction. Hope you're going to place it in something larger. Good fun.

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  31. K.T. HannaSeptember 9, 2011 at 5:44 PM

    This feels like a smaller end to a larger story. Would love to see this expanded. Really liked it.

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  32. UnknownSeptember 11, 2011 at 1:50 AM

    You have written an intriguing and mysterious piece. From such a normal setting you warped the world within a few sentence. Fantasy? Good luck with the challenge.

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  33. UnknownSeptember 11, 2011 at 7:33 AM

    THanks all for insightful comments. Interacting with you all about this piece is pushing me to write even more...a lovely outcome for the journey I am on. I plan to visit everyone I can on Wednesday :).
    Read. Write. Love.

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  34. Lori M. LeeSeptember 12, 2011 at 7:18 AM

    Hi, couldn't find an email so I figured I'd just leave a comment. I wanted to let you know that your piece has been chosen to advance into the semi-finals. Congrats!

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  35. UnknownSeptember 12, 2011 at 10:47 AM

    I am totally thrilled to be in the semi-finals! What a great feeling to have writers read my work and find it worthwhile!

    OK.... super happy dance :)!!!!

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